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Discussion: Perth Suburb Jokes

in: SandgrOpers

Jan 22, 2009 11:32 PM # 
An Armadale Girl enters an adult shop & asks for a vibrator.
The man says: "Choose one from our range on the wall." She says "I'll take the red one."
The man replies: "That's a fire extinguisher."

Q. Two Balga girls jump off a cliff. Who wins?
A. Society.

Q. What does a Cannington girl use as protection during sex?
A. A bus shelter.

Q. What do you call a 30 year old Girrawheen girl?
A. Granny.

Q. Why did the Geraldton girl cross the road?
A. To start a fight with a complete stranger for no reason whatsoever.

Q. What do you call a Midland girl in a white tracksuit?
A. The bride.

Q. What's the first question during a Joondalup quiz night?
A. What you looking at?

Q. Two Mirrabooka kids in a car without any music - who is driving?
A. The policeman.

Q. What's the difference between a boy and a Rockingham girl?
A. A Rockingham girl has a higher sp e r m count.

Q. What's the most confusing day in Rockingham?
A. Fathers day

Q. How do people know Jesus wasn't born in Balga?
A. You try finding 3 wise men and a virgin there!
Jan 23, 2009 12:25 AM # 
... and I was just expecting the one about the relative merits of living Innaloo or Upper Swan...
Jan 23, 2009 2:06 AM # 
Dogs Whomp is a good place too....
Jan 24, 2009 12:59 PM # 
Q. What do you call a man living on top of a hill in a suburb that has no resemblance to its name whatsoever?
A. Tooms.
Jan 25, 2009 3:19 AM # 
Jan 25, 2009 4:08 AM # 
tRicky - what are you doing?? There was nothing inappropriate at all in that last post... or am I just naive?
Jan 25, 2009 5:45 AM # 
Wembley Downs has some downs... we get to ride up them after long hills rides :-(
Jan 25, 2009 11:35 AM # 
Downs - open, rolling, upland country with fairly smooth slopes usually covered with grass (Webster dictionary)

When this suburb in Perth WA was named Wembley Dunes, after the vast expanse of sand that pre-existed, the person responsible for recording suburb names was Scottish, and therefore wrote 'Downs' instead of 'Dunes'.

Mt Lawley, like the other Mts Claremont, Pleasant and Hawthorn, is a misnomer too.
Jan 27, 2009 5:07 AM # 
See, Swan View might be full of bogans and silly people locking their keys in their cars, but at least you can actually view the swan.

Greenmount might have a mount but it ain't green for more than 2 months a year, the rest of the time it's either brown or on fire.

Boya is actually a misspelling of 'booyah!', a common exclamation when the utterer realises they've made it out of Koongamia (let's not even go there, what the hell were they thinking?) with all four wheels still attached to their car.
Jan 27, 2009 6:39 AM # 
Koongamia sounds like a great place for a Metro Series map.
Jan 27, 2009 8:27 AM # 
Fletch - Tooms is inappropriate.
Tooms - every time I come to your place I have to go up.
Simmo - I'll do it for the 2010/11 series if the Kewdale map is a success. Speaking of which, at least in Kewdale we have queues at all the roundabouts we have around here.
Jan 27, 2009 11:14 AM # 
Juffy, is it a black or white one?
Jan 28, 2009 1:28 AM # 
Is what a black or white one? *confused*

tRicky - what are the queues for? A clue? Lessons in how to give way? Or is it just so damn exciting in Kewdale that people queue up for roundabouts just to go around in circles?
Jan 28, 2009 1:39 AM # 
The Swan that you can View. D'uh.
Jan 28, 2009 1:42 AM # 
I'm not sure, it's too busy tearing my face off.

linky especially for Jen. <3
Jan 28, 2009 1:56 AM # 
Oh you're sharp Juffy, you should paymore attention to cricketK...
Jan 28, 2009 2:05 AM # 
Hell no, she might start to expect it.
Apr 15, 2022 9:36 AM # 
riley mcfarlane :
This made me laugh so hard that I travelled 13 years into the past. How did I go from stalking people's training to laughing my procrastinating ass off on a Good Friday???

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