Very nice trip up to northern Vermont yesterday to visit Mike Fritz. A round of golf was on the agenda, of course, and we were joined by Chuck Fergusen, former USOF president among other things. Chuck was in northern Vermont spending a couple of weeks along with Mal Harding training the USA team to the CIOR competition (for reserve officers from NATO countries, various events including shooting, running, swimming, and a miss-mash of orienteering), which is in Denmark later this summer. Chuck and Mal have been doing this for years, even though the military support for the program has been shrinking, and the last time it was our turn to host (2003 or 2004?), we were in the midst of invading Iraq and NATO relations were a bit frosty and the event just never happened.
But a very pleasant discussion about the history.
And also a discussion about a book about orienteering (a how-to book) that Chuck is writing. This idea got started when Human Kinetics, a publisher of various books about various sports, approached what was then USOF and proposed such a book. And Chuck offered to write it. There have been some ups and downs along the way -- a draft or two or three have been done, various copy editors have done their thing, there was a point at which it seemed like the project might be dropped, but right now they are shooting for a publication date of next March. OUSA will get the lion's share of the royalties (Chuck will get a pittance), which is great for the federation. And as for Chuck, well, he is such a nice guy, and a teacher by profession, so he seems totally happy with the deal too. As long as the book eventually comes out.
So this was pretty cool. On a trip to play a little golf, I learned a bunch about a couple of O' things I knew next to nothing about.
In the midst of this we did our thing on the golf course, playing at Mike's home course in Barre. Just to make things clear, Mike is a very good golfer, clearly the best of the three of us. I am a mid-level hacker, sometimes quite good, sometimes quite awful, with an ability to hit all the shots, just never knowing which one is coming next. And Chuck, well, Chuck can hit the ball a long ways, but he too is directionally challenged, plus he has issues with making contact with the ball anywhere close to the center of the club head.
We headed off. Mike, a proper host, found it a bit difficult to concentrate on his game because he kept having to try to keep track of where in the woods or long grass Chuck's ball (and occasionally mine) had disappeared to. Chuck's game, well, it's been said that the game gets boring if you always hit it straight, and watching Chuck was definitely not boring. Mike commented at one point that he had never seen anyone hit it as deep into the woods as Chuck did. But, again, Chuck is such a good guy, a cuss here and there as to be expected, but mainly a bunch of laughing.
And me? I played pretty well, except for one major psychological meltdown which I feel obliged to report here, perhaps with the hope that part of dealing better with such things in the future is acknowledging the problem.
We walked off the ninth green, headed for the tenth tee, and noticed that the group in front of us was just arriving at the tee, having detoured to the bathrooms or, more likely, the bar. So we had a few minutes to wait. There was a single player behind us whom Mike knew, and Mike suggested it might be nice to ask if he wanted to join us. Was that OK with us?
And I found myself thinking, Why would we want to do that, we're having a good time now, what's to be gained? But also a little bit thinking, sure, why not. And then saying, Sure, fine with me.
So he came and joined us, and right away I just had this strong feeling that I wish it was still just the three of us. But what's done is done.
And then we hit off the 10th, and Chuck hits a ground ball and I hit one deep in the woods to the right. And my morale was just plummeting. And over the 10 or 15 minutes it took to play the hole, I got progressively angrier at myself for how I was reacting -- I really really wanted to go hide in a closet, or something similar, anything to get out of the current situation. I was just losing it.
This has happened before. Not too often, no connection with golf in the past, just there have been times I would get into situations I didn't like and I'd have a really hard time dealing with it. And usually all I wanted to do was go hide.
So after what seemed an eternity I walked off the 10th green, having recorded a well-deserved 9 in the process after a series of horrendous shots -- golf being just one of many things that are hard to do well if your brain is fried. And I walked off by myself and ask myself, Is there any possibility you can show some maturity here? Because this behavior is ridiculous. And the prospect of acting like that, and playing golf like that, for 8 more holes was rather unappealing. Calm down, behave yourself, stop being such a jerk, keep your head down, and don't swing so hard.
And within 10 minutes, or perhaps even 5, my morale, having hit probably a low for this year, was climbing sharply. I'm not sure if the better attitude led to better golf swings, or better golf swings led to better attitude -- the mind/body connection in sports is well documented -- but by the time we walked off the 11th I was enjoying life, chatting pleasantly with our new companion, and thinking, That was one, just seven more pars to break 80 (one can dream).
And the rest of the round was lots of fun.
I don't know why such meltdowns happen. They certainly happen much less than they used to, and I certainly am better at recovering than I used to be. They are embarrassing. It would be nice to think that at some point I would be able to deal with such things with more maturity.
But there were certainly times in the past, when confronted with such a meltdown, that 24 hours later I still would be trying to pull out of it. Fifteen minutes of misery is a lot better than 24 hours (or more). I guess I should be thankful for the progress there has been.
81-42-2-35.